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Lindsey Graham’s Funeral Includes Separate Roommate Section
"He was quite the devil back then too,” chuckled 71-year-old Gary Hall. “Except it was less pro-bombing and anti-autonomy, more pro-tickling and anti-me shaving my chest hair.”
Mackenzie Moore


Primates Announce ‘Planet of the Apes’ Takeover: ‘We Only Held Back for Jane Goodall’
“We were going to do this back in the '60s, but then Jane Goodall traveled to Tanzania and saved your parasitic asses,” said Banjo, a chimp representing Rwanda.
Mackenzie Moore


Oscar the Grouch decries ‘woke’ Sesame Street after being forcefully moved to compost bin
"They took me away from my family heirlooms!" complained Oscar, referring to dirty diapers, plastic bottles full of dip spit, and a Doritos bag from 1972.
Mackenzie Moore


The Desk: Election Day 2024 edition
The Desk 11/5/24
Mackenzie Moore
Nov 5, 20242 min read


Report: Neighbor only mowing lawn at 6:30 a.m. to justify breakfast beer
"Nothing better than a cold beer while working hard with the sun beating down on ya," said Boyer far too early for heat to be an issue.
Mackenzie Moore
Sep 18, 20242 min read


Death row, the Taliban, and the Dallas Cowboys
The Desk 8/26/24
Mackenzie Moore
Aug 26, 20242 min read


Healing crystal collection primarily gravel, glass found in parking lots
Sometimes, new pieces find Sheila Humphrey when she least expects it.
Mackenzie Moore
Feb 21, 20242 min read


'Mein Kampf' to be only book allowed in school libraries
"This country would be an awful lot better if people accepted the good word into their hearts," said Welles.
Mackenzie Moore
Oct 7, 20232 min read
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