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Lindsey Graham’s Funeral Includes Separate Roommate Section
"He was quite the devil back then too,” chuckled 71-year-old Gary Hall. “Except it was less pro-bombing and anti-autonomy, more pro-tickling and anti-me shaving my chest hair.”
Mackenzie Moore


Primates Announce ‘Planet of the Apes’ Takeover: ‘We Only Held Back for Jane Goodall’
“We were going to do this back in the '60s, but then Jane Goodall traveled to Tanzania and saved your parasitic asses,” said Banjo, a chimp representing Rwanda.
Mackenzie Moore


Oscar the Grouch decries ‘woke’ Sesame Street after being forcefully moved to compost bin
"They took me away from my family heirlooms!" complained Oscar, referring to dirty diapers, plastic bottles full of dip spit, and a Doritos bag from 1972.
Mackenzie Moore


Iran War, March Madness, and Conan O'Brien's Cleavage
The Desk 3/19/26
Mackenzie Moore
Mar 192 min read


March Madness, happiness, and pig kidneys
The Desk 3/22/24
Mackenzie Moore
Mar 22, 20242 min read


Bucky Badger, Willie the Wildcat attend therapy together prior to matchup: 'For Becky'
"She wanted to eat Bec-key Lime Pie ice cream and drink glass after glass of milk. You're a cat — you're lactose intolerant!" said Bucky.
Mackenzie Moore
Nov 10, 20233 min read


TCU kicked out of March Madness after shooting blood at Gonzaga players through eyes
Down late in the second half, survival instincts kicked in for the Horned Frogs.
Mackenzie Moore
Mar 20, 20232 min read
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